Divorce Rates

For some reason I decided to look into divorce statistics:
Here's some interesting nuggets:

% of married people making it to their:
05th anniversary -- 82%
10th anniversary -- 65%
15th anniversary -- 52%
25th anniversary -- 33%
35th anniversary -- 20%
50th anniversary -- 05%
of course death plays a role in some marriages not reaching those 25+ anniversaries.

And it looks like the statistics of 50% of all marriages ends in divorce is about right, but only
41% of 1st marriages ends in divorce, as compared to
60% of 2nd marriages ends in divorce
73% of 3rd marriages ends in divorce

These statistics are pretty staggering. The divorce rates for asians in america is a lot lower than the average, about 20% vs the 40%-50% rate.

My wife and I have been married for 15 years now. Hopefully we'll be around for the subsequent milestones (25th, 35th,...50th and beyond)

To those of you who are married, GOOD LUCK!!

Back to school

The summer ended, all too quickly the last two months has gone by. The kids are back in school for 2 weeks now. While my "struggle" with getting my kids to & from school is very easy (they walk/bike to school by themselves), I'm reminded by others how difficult it can be.
This leads me to remind young parents/couples to really pay attention when they buy their house. They want to buy a house in a good school district, and just as importantly, they want to make sure that the house is a walkable distance to all the schools (elementary, middle & high school). This saves so much hassle. No worrying about dropping the kids off at school, picking them up in the afternoon.
I've heard stories from friends & acquaintance where they lose as much as an hour dropping off/picking up their kids at school each day. It's just one less thing to worry about. I was fairly lucky that my house is next to a park, and close to all the schools. I say lucky in that when I bought my house as a single guy, I knew I wanted a good location, but I didn't specifically made sure that it was walkable to school. Now that my kids are in school, I realized how much easier it had made my life.

Mid-life crisis musing

I've been wondering about mid-life crisis for the last few years. When it would show up? How it would show up? And how would I deal with it?

I've decided I won't have a mid-life crisis, because most of the time, those people would do something stupid/crazy/wild to recapture their youth. I don't need to do that. I'm married to a woman who looks like my daughter when we're out together. How much younger can I get?

On a more serious note, I think the important thing is to assess your life and be thankful for all the good things in it. If your life isn't what you thought/hoped it would be, then look into yourself and see what you can do to make it better. But to run away from your problems is to take the coward's way out.

I read this quote in the New York Times and thought is was insightful:
“If you spend your entire life searching for keys — the key to happiness, the key to success, the key to health, the key to love — you may become startled and somewhat humbled at the end of your time on this planet to realize that no keys were to be found because there never were any locks.”
I see it as that there are no limitations, no secrets. Life is what you make of it. It's up to you. Go live your life.

I sometimes joke with my wife that my favorite quote is: "Eventually, why not now!"
It can be good or bad, depends on how you use it. But if you're waiting until "retirement" to start doing things like traveling, learning for knowledge's sake, reading for pleasure, being more active in the community, doing more volunteering, etc.... you might as well start now.

Thang

How to give of yourself

Whatever you do something for someone else, "you must always make sure that you are genuinely enjoying yourself. Doing things for other people's sake will lead to feelings of corrosive resentment that will then find expression in some unhealthy fashion, like cancer. Your first responsibility is to your own happiness. If you are unhappy and you do things merely out of a sense of duty rather than genuine love and generosity, then others will sense that and ugliness will result." (Tom Hodgkinson - writer for Slate.com)

This is what I think about helping/taking care of other people, but can't always articulate as clearly as this person did. Hopefully, I will keep this in mind.

Exercising

Went for a 14 miles run/walk last Saturday. It took 3 hours but it got done. I'm going to try to do this once a month, and see if I can get the time down to 2 hours 30 minutes by year end.

The blog has been dead since last August, this is due to the fact that not much is happening, and that time is going by so fast now. Will try to be more frequent about this.

recession

this is the first recession that i can remember feeling like a recession. the last recession (2001-2003), didn't feel like a recession, especially if you still have jobs. the dollars was strong, stuff were cheap, so if you were still making money, things were great. the recession before that (1990-1992), i was young, had a job and so didn't notice it either. eventhough i still have my job this time around, everything is so much more expensive, and the dollars is slipping against other currencies so traveling is more expensive as well. as the economy feels tighter for me, i sure hope other folks are doing okay or better. good luck to us all.

Life's juggle

Something profound that I read today in the NY Times:

"Think of life as a game in which we juggle five balls labeled Work, Family, Health, Friends and Integrity. One day you understand Work is a rubber ball. You drop it and it bounces back, the other four balls are made of glass. Drop one of those, and it will be irrevocably marked, scuffed, nicked and maybe even shattered.”

Happy New Year

It's 1-1-2008, and another has passed. 2007 was an uneventful year. We got to travel a little bit, kept our jobs, made a few bucks, got a little healthier and that was the extent of it.
I expect the new year to be more of the same. I do plan to get healthier, I'm planning to exercise more frequently, and with a little more intensity. I'm hoping my trading will generate some extra income. And just maybe we'll make that trip to Asia we've been wanting to for awhile now. And try to enjoy more of the great cuisine we have in the bay area.

Cruise - before and after

The family went on an 8-day Carribean cruise over Thanksgiving. It was a nice relaxing time. The most interesting thing for me was how different this cruise was compared to the Alaska cruise I took 6 years ago. And the difference was all due to the changes in me.
From the Alaska cruise I gained 5 pounds, and for a month afterward, I was constantly hungry. This is understandable given that while on the cruise, I was eating like a pig. The first night I ordered 2 entrees for dinner, by the last night, I ordered 4 entrees for dinner. (fyi, I'm only 5 feet tall and weighs about 120 lbs.).
Given the health kicks I've been on this year, I actually lost 1 pound during this cruise. The food was good and I ate plenty (usually an extra appetizer or entree, not as much as the last cruise, but still more than usual), but what changed was how active I was. I made an effort to exercise during the cruise. This is a first for me. I normally count on being active enough during vacation (walking, swimming with the kids) to burn the calories, but this time I actually used the gym on board to exercise almost every day. And surprisingly I was not feeling the hunger after this cruise as I did the one before.

It's amazing what a change in mind-set can do.

Thang

health update

Got my blood test back yesterday. My cholesterol level was 180, this is much better than it was 3 years ago when it was 218. At the time, I told my wife I'll watch my diet and try to be more active to see how it goes. Can't believe it actually works.

As a person who use to compete in sports, I needed some targets to shoot for in my exercise. I decide that my goal is for every distance that I care to be able to run, my time to shoot for would be twice the world record time. That is, if the world record for the 100m dash is 9.5 seconds, then i should try to do it in 19 seconds. For the real short sprints, this is not too big of a deal, but for distance it can be tough. That means that i got to get myself in good enough shape to run a 7:30 minutes mile. Not impossible, but a lot of work nonetheless. Let's see how this plays out.

exercise update

it's been 5 months since I started to get somewhat serious about exercising, i'm happy to report that i'm still doing it. i'm playing tennis 2-3 times a week, i've started to join some friends for an 8 miles walk every sunday morning for the last month. and starting today i'll be doing some exercise in the morning as well. since i committed to taking my son to school at 7:15am everyday, i'm planning to exercise for about 30 minutes everyday in the morning (either running in the streets or calisthenics at home). this will be in addition to what i've been doing. let's see how long this will last.

the one effect of all this exercising is that i feel slight aches and pains all the time from sore heels, arms, legs, etc.. also because i feel i've earned the right to eat a little more, i've actually gained weight, not much, but enough to cause me to be more vigilant about what i eat. the other thing is my heart rate has gone back down to about 58 bpm. it has gotten as high as 70 a few years ago. in college, when i was a lot more active it was in the low or mid 50s. i'll monitor the next month to see whether i can keep up the morning exercise, and what impact it has.

life is hard

spent a hour yesterday at the driving with a bunch of friends after we dropped our wives off at the mall. then off to lunch with our wives @ bistro jeanty in yountville. then back to my house to play poker with the boys, while we waited for our wives to shop some more. then off to the A's game with the family and some friends. it was a stressful day, with so much to do :)

ps. i need more days like this

meteor shower

My wife manage to convince me and my kids to stay up until midnight lastnight to watch the meteor shower. I set up the sleeping bag in the backyard and the four of us crawled in. In the 20 minutes outside we managed to see about 6-8 meteor. It was very neat. We even saw a couple of meteors with tail. It was something that I've seen in the movies but never in real life. Nature can always amaze us if we just take the time. The meteor went by so fast, none of us was ever able to make a wish.

Thang

hard work

blogging is hard work, I've find it very difficult to keep up the blog. I just don't feel interesting enough to keep going. It's like there's nothing new. Hopefully I'll make a better effort.

Let's boycott Exxon-Mobil over price gouging!

I'm sick of high gas prices, and not going to take it lying down. In looking over major oil companies' financials, it's obvious that Exxon-Mobil makes the most money selling oil. Of all of the major oil companies, they have the highest gross margin at 48.8%, the rest ranges from 16% (Valero) to 36% (Conoco Phillips). This may be because they are the most efficient but it seems unlikely to be the only reason. In any case, it is impossible to boycott all the oil companies because we need gasoline, but we could boycott 1 oil company and make enough of an impact to make a statement. This is possible because there are enough alternatives in most US cities.

I'm picking Exxon-Mobil to boycott because they are the biggest and most profitable oil company in the world. They are the flagship of the oil industry.

The plan is to boycott Exxon-Mobil products for the next 3 months: July, August & September. If we can get enough people to join in, it will be enough to affect their bottom line and show up in their quarterly reports. Which should affect their stock price. Let's hit them where it counts.

Let's get the word out, and let the boycott begin.